The Power of Makeup

The other day, Cajun forwarded me a link to a gallery featuring pornstars without makeup. Apparently it’s been circulating around the internet quite a bit this week.

Looking though it, one thing becomes glaringly obvious – most of these women, who are celebrated for their beauty and look pretty damn hot when they are on screen, are pretty plain without their makeup on.

I’m not shocked. I’ve seen enough women in the morning to know what makeup and lighting do to women, and how to see through it.

But a lot of guys get caught up in the illusion. They get taken in by the hair and the makeup, and wind up putting these women on a pedestal. These women are “10″‘s, they say, and they think they really need to do something special to get these girls. I can’t tell you how many times a student has gone up to me and said “Go approach that ten man”, and I’ve looked around and he’s pointing at a girl like this.

Dani Daniels

Dani Daniels With and without Makeup

When I see a girl like this, I see the top-right photo. I see a girl who is pretty, but she’s trying hard to impress. She’s wearing a mask, both literally and figuratively. With her mask, she’s powerful, an object of desire from men around her, without the mask, she’s just another girl. I don’t believe in judging women (at least before I talk to them), but you can presume that she is wearing the mask for a reason. Maybe it’s for power over men, maybe it’s to keep up with her girlfriends, maybe it’s because she’s insecure, but there’s always a reason.

Other guys see only the mask. They are taken in by her glamour and think they see something truly special. But she’s just another girl. They’re all just girls.  If you want to be able to relate to these women as people, and to really understand them, you have to see through the illusion. You can’t let it fool you. She’s a regular person with regular person problems and probably a life that’s a bit dull.

On the other hand, one of my favorite things is when you’re in a coffee shop on a Sunday morning and all of a sudden, the girl at the top left of this picture walks in.

Rilee Marks

Rilee Marks With and Without Makeup

She’s cute, probably pretty enough to attract some looks at the coffee shop, but not a pin-up girl. Maybe she was up late studying, is dressed a bit shleppy, her hair isn’t done, and she’s got a cute little gap between her teeth. But even at 11am on a Sunday, you can tell that she has something special about her. The smile, the eyes, those are real.

And so you chat her up, and get her number, and later that week you meet up and bam, the girl on the right shows up. There’s nothing nicer than getting a pretty girl’s number, and having a stunner show up at your date. It happens.

Of course, if you’re a guy who has limiting beliefs about beauty, you’re going to mess things up. In the first case, you’re going to mess things up because you fall for her mask, and give her beauty more meaning than it deserves. In the second case, you might pass up making a convenient move on a gorgeous girl because she’s looking a little bit frumpy.

You need to look past the makeup, and go for women who stir something inside of you. Don’t put beautiful women on a pedestal, or overlook the beauty in the women around you. And always, always, go for what YOU want, not for what you think would impress your friends, or what you thing you “ought” to go for.

It’s just good game.

Chris ShepherdThe Power of Makeup
  • Sticky Fingers

    Well said, man. I’ve always believed guys with “high standards” are full of excuses not to take action.

    • http://www.tenmagnet.com/dating-coach/ Chris Shepherd

      At an extreme, high standards can be totally toxic. The problem being that even gorgeous girls look better from across the bar than they do up close. Focusing on the negative with women’s beauty is just as toxic as focusing on the negative in any other area of your life: you can always find problems, and find a reason to be unsatisfied. It’s depressive thinking.

  • http://www.thejourneyofsuperman.com Superman

    Great find! This should be at the top of every porn site lol.

    • http://www.tenmagnet.com/dating-coach/ Chris Shepherd

      Warning: People in this film may not be exactly as they appear!

  • http://chiefpua.com Chief

    This is some great commentary about that shocking collection of women with and without makeup. I feel the need to share your article! Maybe I’ll write my own blog post about this :)

    • http://www.tenmagnet.com/dating-coach/ Chris Shepherd

      Go for it man. You’ll get a trackback link.

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  • http://www.introvertedplayboy.com Introverted Playboy

    Makeup is such an integral part of the modern woman’s world. It’s everywhere. Just go into MAC cosmetics and you’ll see this whole parallel universe. Yet the average guy is completely unaware of it. Fun fact: in the late 19th century and earlier, the only women who wore makeup were prostitutes.

    I looked through all of the pictures on imgur, and most of the girls are average without makeup, some are just downright ugly, and a few are genuinely pretty or beautiful without it (at least to me, probably to other guys too).

    I think that says something about porn: it’s a way for many average or unattractive girls to feel beautiful and sexy and desired, unfortunately many have psychological issues that they are resolving through porn. There are very few girls in that list that are “Holy shit” gorgeous without makeup. Something to think about.

  • Explorer

    “And always, always, go for what YOU want, not for what you think would impress your friends, or what you thing you “ought” to go for.”

    This quote has come at the right time. I feel like the “hot makeup” girls that I’ve dated always end up making me feel very bored with the interaction, but when I see “non-makeup Sunday 11am” girls, they always seem more interesting and surprisingly have me falling for them moreso.

    And then yes, when I meet them at night and they are stunning, it just completes the whole picture and I’m sold.

    But I always felt self-conscious because when my friends would see the girls I prefer, they would raise an eyebrow and say that I could do better in the looks department.

    Your quote has made me stronger and more confident of my desires in women. I just want to say thanks, Chris, for writing this post.

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  • http://matiasbravojara.wordpress.com matiasbravojara

    As explorer wrote, the last comment really hits. I also feel that I’m concerned about what other people/friends think and even though I work with this on a daily basis in all other areas in my life I will now also do this in dating. Thanks man and keep up the good work

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