How to make a woman feel comfortable by NOT hitting on her right away

This is part 3 in my picking up for beginners class.

Many of the students I teach REEK of “pick up vibe” when I initially take them out on bootcamp. Even though I go over this in detail during the workshop, they do it anyways.

So, why don’t you hit on her right away? The main reason is this: picking up women is lame. Women want to be picked up by guys who are too cool to pick up women. Obviously, this creates a rather frustrating paradox.

The only way out is to not hit on her, and wait till you get IOI’s. By not hitting on her right away, you’re coming across as unique, and different than the hundreds of other guys she’s met at bars who run around kamikaze style trying not to get shot down. Also, by not hitting on a woman, you’re subtly demonstrating that you probably have other women in your life, and that you’re the kind of guy that is cool enough that women usually come to you.

A few tips for how to NOT hit on a woman:

- Don’t just walk up and face her. Talk to her over your shoulder. Preferably, you should have a reason to not face her directly, like you’re at the bar, or still facing a friend. Once the conversation starts happening, you can face her.

- Tease her, treat her like your bratty little sister – you like her but she’s dorky. This is where negging comes in. Negs are, at their core, just things that a guy wouldn’t say to a girl who he was trying to pick up. So just say (my favorite neg) “you and I would NOT get along”. Believe me, that neg does a remarkably good job of geting women to chase you.

Also, one other thing – Negs aren’t insults. There are a lot of guys out there who think “You look like you’re wearing a wig” is a neg. These people are dumb and you should ignore their advice.

Head back to How to Pick up Women for Beginners

Chris ShepherdHow to make a woman feel comfortable by NOT hitting on her right away