As a Canadian, one of my favorite things to do when I’m traveling is to act like a complete jerk, and then tell people that I’m American. I know it’s a pretty terrible thing to do, but I’m a bit of a nihilist, and kind of like contributing to Anti-American sentiments worldwide – if only just to stir the pot a bit.

Anyway, in the spirit of this game, I will introduce to you a 100%, guaranteed way to piss off a bartender in Dublin. It goes like this.

Bartender – What can I get you..

10Mag – I dunno.. do you have any local beers?

Bartender – Well, we have Guinness!

10Mag – No, I don’t want a Guinness… What’s that local beer you have… the dark one?

Bartender – Guinness!

10Mag – No, not that one… it’s really dark. I can get it at my bar back home.

Bartender – ??

10Mag – Heineken? Is that made in Dublin??

Then, continue to describe Guinness in as much detail as possible, all the while insisting that you’re NOT talking about Guinness. Eventually, give up and order a Corona, and then tell them how “we saved your ass in World War II”.

This joke was inspired by the Kids in the Hall skit below.

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