Identity, part 2
Ok, some more on identity.
First off, there are two key elements to a good identity. Status and Excitement. A really kickass identity hits both of these elements hard, most good identities hit one or the other, and if you have neither, you need some work.
For example, if you’re an engineer, your job conveys a decent amount of status to the average woman. Engineers are perceived as, hard working, successful, and wealthy. Women don’t go crazy over engineers, but if you handle it right, mentioning that you’re an engineer is something that can make you more attractive to the average women, not less. The big problem is that engineers have a problem with being perceived as boring. A lot of engineers are REALLY self-conscious about what they do, and think it turns girls off. They’re wrong.
Here’s the mistake they make. They think that women think like this:
Engineer = Boring
But women are smarter than that. The average woman’s thinking goes more like this.
Engineer = Rich, Smart.
Engineer + boring = double boring.
Engineer + geek = geek^2.
Engineer + cool = guy I want to meet.
(I put this explanation in mathematical terms for all you engineers, computer programmers and math geeks out there).
So, as an engineer, when you’re talking with a woman, there’s no need to hide what you do, or to downplay or avoid it. You want to be proud and convey (strongly) the status that you have as an engineer. But you want to carefully avoid anything that conveys geekyness or is boring.
So I posted earlier about how I talk about Battlestar Galactica to girls…. If you’re an engineer, ignore that advice. Different rules for different people.
I had a student recently who was an accountant. Accountant is a lot like engineer in that it conveys a good deal of status (he was a really successful accountant), but is pretty weak in the excitement department. He asked me if he should put his collection of rare stocks and banknotes on the wall of his apartment.
I was like “hell no!”. That’s wayyy too geeky. We decided he’d decorate his apartment in a more “rock and roll” theme.
Much better…. 
Maybe you can go more in depth about how to create higher status if ur job really does suck… or how to create more excitement if ur job is a computer engineer. It looks like u just brushed over the concept opposed to going into practical tips.
Also i heard ur gf is named Olga from american pie 5, where is a pic of her? lol
April 11th, 2007 at 10:48 amActually, Olga and I broke up a little while ago. She doesn’t have a speaking role in American pie, and I’m not going to give out pictures of her, out of respect for her privacy.
Suffice to say, she is a fantastic and gorgeous girl.
April 11th, 2007 at 12:26 pmDont you think your making things to complicated.
Couldn’t he just have put out his banknotes and said “would you like to see them?” and then if she wasn’t to interested just talk about rock and roll?
You guys talk about being quite cool but not to much etc. etc.
April 19th, 2007 at 12:13 pmWouldnt it just be easier to chill?
I used to have huge identity problems, being as I am in a Navy Officer. The perception is conservative, kind of boring. I solved it by adopting a public identity that was fun, outgoing, and in fact completely atypical of a Navy officer. It works, because people are now genuinely surprised and interested when they figure out what my job is, instead of “Oh”.
May 8th, 2007 at 2:31 pm